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There are, people say, five stages of grieving - anger, guilt, grief, acceptance, renewal. Much of this psalm is experience people have told me about, as well as words of wisdom from Robert Runcie in 1985.


  1. I wasn't even able to say goodbye:
     why have you removed him away from me so suddenly?
  2. Why should this happen to me:
     he had done nothing to deserve such treatment.
  3. They said to me, "Do not weep":
     am I not to cry for the loss of my companion;
  4. even the greatest have wept in disappointment:
     am I not also allowed to express my feelings?
  5. They said, "Keep busy", but already I'm exhausted:
     they said, "Time will heal", but still it hasn't done so.
  6. Help me to manage my memories:
     whatever I recall brings only pain and grief.
  7. Yet I find comfort in my friends:
     in their presence is a token of your care;
  8. their loving embrace is a sign of your support:
     the kindness of a handshake can speak of your graciousness.
  9. In your presence, I can face what has happened:
     grant me to accept it, as you accept me.
  10. The past is not fixed for ever:
     help me reap more treasures from all my experience,
  11. nor is the past something lost for eternity:
     my friendship and my joy are not gone for ever;
  12. for as I remember, I glimpse what you see always:
     now you see him face to face, as you see me.
  13. Continue to be with me as I look ahead:
     give me courage to rebuild my life for your future.